The Art of Mentoring by Shirley Peddy

Author:Shirley Peddy [Peddy, Shirley]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 096513766X
Publisher: Bullion Books
Published: 2012-08-19T04:00:00+00:00

The Fallacy of Focusing on Feelings

“I know. Neither can I. At the same time, Katy, what I’ve found, at least in my own case is, it’s best not to focus on how I feel. What I do is far more important. If I worry about what’s going on with the other person, I’m literally working ‘the wrong side of the street.’ I remember years ago that I had a conflict with a co-worker. Her office was three doors down the hall, but you would have thought we were miles away from one another. She used to write me long memos criticizing my part of a brochure that we were supposed to be working on together. I don’t know how much energy I wasted fuming about that.”

“So what did you do?”

“Instead of confronting her, I complained to my boss. Needless to say, he didn’t want to hear about it. He said he had his share of problems and told me he had great confidence in my ability to solve my own. He also gave me a piece of advice which I follow to this day. He said, ‘Rachel, forget about who’s right or wrong. It’s important to know that when you come to me and complain about someone else, it makes you look weak. If you can’t resolve a simple personal problem, how can I ask you to work on larger, more complex issues?”

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